part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Randomize
