forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
