im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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