ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
