that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
She needs sedatives and a leash
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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