If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Someone came in the potted fern
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
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