This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
