Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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