Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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