I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
it glows. i had to have it.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Randomize
