Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
