Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
