Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Randomize
