and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
that's an acceptable place to lick
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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