I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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