I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I woke up this morning with a text from my mom as to why the hell random people were showing up at the house. Turns out nobody came to our house party because I gave them my old address, fuck pre-partying for real
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
