The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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