Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
We left an ass print on the piano.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
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