where am i from again
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
