Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
I DEMAND FORESKIN
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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