Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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