HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
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