Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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