Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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