And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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