Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Randomize
