So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
You were trust falling into bushes
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
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