You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
