Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
Randomize