Me too!
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
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