I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Randomize
