Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Randomize
