So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I've blown a few things in my day
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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