My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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