If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
