Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
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