I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i wish my penis had a tongue
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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