they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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