what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
