If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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