i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
