there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
