It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize