I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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