just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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