but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
