Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
