The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Randomize
