Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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