Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Good morning! So would you prefer me to show up kind of late or on time but looking like I got chewed up and spat out by an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer?
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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