I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
Randomize
